I'm slowly convincing people that I'm crazy

On my street, I mean.

Most of the time I don't realize how often I talk to my dogs.  See, I talk to them a lot when we're at home.  You know, just regular stuff.. "Lila, what should we have for dinner tonight, hm?" "Jake, you want a treat, don't ya?" "Hey, one of you go get me a beer.  Well, go on!  Dammit, worthless dogs.. Fine, I'll get it myself!"

You know, the usual.

Often, I'll forget myself and talk to them while we're out.  Hey, no biggie, really.. I mean, this is NYC.. We're known for our weirdos out here, so a girl talking to her dogs isn't that unusual.

Totally not that unusual.

It isn't, ok??

I forgot myself again.  And, well, it was cold out tonight.  And the dogs leashes kinda look like reins, y'know?  And we were on an empty sidewalk anyway.  So I start imagining in my head that I'm an intrepid and fierce adventurer in the arctic with my loyal and hearty dogs, sledding thru the tundra.

"Hyah! Mush! Mush, Lila! Mush, Jake! Onward! Hyah! Haha!"

Yes, I was yelling this.

Then I'd flick their reins, uh.. I mean leashes, I'd flick their leashes a little, and they'd start wagging their tails and walking faster.  

I was on my 3rd or so delivery of "mush" when I look up and there is a woman standing there and watching me.  In a doorway that I hadn't seen.  Of course.

She was smiling a little, but I suspect it was in the smile-so-the-crazy-girl-with-the-dogs-doesn't-attack-me kinda way.

I just buried my head in my scarf and promptly ran down the block.

Fuck.  Why do I insist on humiliating myself on the regular?

Me and my sled dogs are now safely inside where the embarrassment can fade.  And be relived as I tell it to you.  Sigh.

Dating can be hazardous to your sanity.

True story.  Dating is crazy these days.  Or maybe I'm just getting all the crazies.  I dunno.  They should really wear a sign or something.

My reintroduction to the dating world, post breakup, was not fun.  In fact, it felt like getting punched in the face.  

With a shovel.

I met the guy online.  He seemed nice and normal (don't they all?) and we exchanged a few messages.  After about a week we moved from email to texting and a phone call.

Still seemed nice and normal (how do they do that?).

We exchanged full names before arranging to meet.  He gave me the link to his company website (he had a few more pics of himself on it) and being the modern girl I am (read: internet nerd) I immediately set about googling the shit out of him.

Turns out, he was quite wealthy.  

I'm talking write ups in magazines wealthy.

Art collections bequeathed to major NYC art institutions wealthy.

Rents private planes to fly wealthy.

Damn.  And his pics were cute.

So, we arrange to meet up at a charming hotel bar.  Here in NYC, some of the best bars are hotel bars, so it's definitely not skeezy as it sounds.  He was there when I arrived.  I walked up and smiled as he stood up to shake my hand.  

Heels were a bad choice.

The guy was attractive, yes.  But short.  So, so short.  I'm 5'4" without heels, 5'7" with.

He was a good 4 inches shorter than me.

OK, fine.  I'm not (that) superficial.  Let's get on with the date.  We sat and chatted, the usual stuff.  The waiter approaches us and asks for our drink choices.  I order white wine (note, I have a strict 2 drink max on first dates). He orders water.

Water.

Apparently he doesn't like the taste of alcohol.  Motherfucker.. wut?  

Um, ok.  

We get back to chatting.  Today, I don't really remember what we talked about, just normal stuff I suppose.  What I do remember is he mentioned 4 times, over the course of our 2 hour date, that he "was NOT cheap."  Alright, sure.  Odd thing to point out.  But he made a point of paying for my drink.

By the third time he brought up how not cheap he was, I was ready to break my 2 drink rule.

You'd think that being "not cheap" kinda goes without saying.  It's one of those things that if you have to say it, you probably are.

Now, as the waiter brings my second glass of wine, Not Cheap here makes sure to ask "It's OK if we bring these up to my room, yes?"

Again.. motherfucker, wut?

Then he turns to me and asks if I would like to go "hang out."  Uh, isn't that what we're doing here?  I politely decline, mention that I prefer NOT to sleep with men the first time I meet them.

Then he leans forward and says he can make it worth my while.

Now, I pride myself on being a smart girl.  I'm certainly no dunce.  But man, was I slow on the uptake there.  

"Make it worth my while?  What do you mean?"

Duh, Nicole.

He leans forward again and says, "$1000."

Well, lookee that.  Guess he's not cheap after all.

He's just a fucking creeper.

I downed my drink and ran out of there so fast.  I guess those extra 4 inches I had on him came in handy, as he couldn't catch up to me.

Thank God there are always a million cabs outside of hotels.

Worst intro into dating.  Ever.

Sunny Seattle

Welp, I am back in NYC from visiting fam and friends in Seattle.  Can you believe we only had a single day of rain over the two weeks that I was there?

Fucking miracle, is what that is.

And of course, it is currently raining here in the city.  But check out this pic from Sunday.  The pops and I headed up to Vancouver to indulge in some alcohol and crabs.

Seafood, people.

How freaking lovely is that?

Of course, bridges aren't the same when not staring at them while slightly inebriated.

That's a Pomberry Sangria, is what that is.  Or something like that.  I dunno.  All I know is that by #4 I was feeling all sorts of good.

And of course, my fine dining attire.

Side note.. They really shouldn't let you watch Pixar movies in public.  Like, say.. On an airplane.

Yeah, Brave?  I sniffled.  Like a little bitch.  

OK, that's a lie.. I had tears full on running down the face.  What the hell has it been with Pixar movies lately?  I was sobbing after the first 10 minutes of UP.

Yeah.. you know they had you crying too.

Wait.. WHO are you?

Uh.. Yeah.  It's me.  Almost a year since my last post.  I swear I hadn't meant to let it go this long.  But it did.  *hangs head in shame*

Tons of things have happened since last year and I really wish I had been faithfully blogging about them since it was such an up and down year.  Not even like a rollercoaster up and down.

More like a fucking bungee jump.

Here's the rundown on what's been happening and what I hope to happen, and subsequently hope to blog about.

• The boyfriend and I moved to Brooklyn, to a very small, but very cute, apartment.
• The boyfriend and I became the EX-boyfriend and I. Thankfully, we're still really great friends, we just weren't working out as a couple any longer.  He moved out, I kept the apartment as it was in my name.
• He's in a new relationship with a nice girl and lives with her part-time.  I'm enjoying being single, dating and meeting all sorts of different guys and seeing what's out there!
• We still share our dogs, tho they live with me.
• My parents went thru a (very) messy divorce that's finally been settled.
• I graduated from my acting conservatory last year and the most notable things I've done since then is a few commercials and a small part for a show on the Oprah Winfrey Network (just a one time thing).
• I'm debating moving back to Seattle for a little bit (max a year) to save up some money, build up my resume a bit (less competition but that also means less opportunities tho) then look into moving to Cali.

That's all that I can think of off the top of my head, really.  Other then that, I've been dating some, but no one serious.  I've been doing the usual NYC stuff: going to shows, shopping, hanging out with friends, exploring Brooklyn, etc. 

I'm also currently in Seattle right now for a visit.  I was here last month too, for my 10 year reunion (waaah.. I don't wanna get old!!) and to be a bridesmaid in a good friend's wedding.

Anyway, sorry this wasn't much of a post, rather just an info dump, but typing it all out makes me feel like I've started catching up.  And given me a few ideas on future blog posts.  Like my first post-breakup date.

Oh, God.  Why?

Yeah, that should tip you off.  It wasn't good.  It wasn't good at all.  Thank God I can laugh about it now.

While silently weeping into my pillow at night.

But that's neither here nor there.  'Til next time!